Yer average Toyota driver, then?

Just take her for a spin in a Series 1. After that, she'll appreciate how posh yer Disco is.

You prefer the taste of EP90 then?

But it doesn't taste as good as the Absinthe.

You've got a proper Land Rover. Good on you for saving the old girl. Can't help you with that part - local chap has one for sale at 130 quid so that's a bit mental innit? Have you tried yer local engineer? Lots of people have a lathe in their shed and could probably make you one. No idea what...

You've got a boat that goes uphill? Now that's impressive.

They're good when you chuck 'em out the back of a Hercules though.

Don't get a red one. Red ones can't go uphill.

Leave the tilt off. Put a coat on when it rains.

All those bits! How many of 'em needed a spanner & how many just fell off?

Parp parp!

Mind you, the chickens do keep me warm - all those feathers ;)

Take your time, take your time. Don't forget: all answers to my posts should start with the words "FFS Heidi..." ;)

Basil the Hat paid three quid for one last night. It looked feckin awful: you wouldn't catch me eating one of those things... :p

You're being a bit TOO helpful. If you're not careful you'll get banned from this forum ;)