The Mad Hat Man said:

yu learnin - Minge nevva pays & Mondeo aint much betta

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you are so right and grunt and pigpen have a funny aroma about them! at least treworgey has offered to meet me behind his shed! mind you, he did ask me to marry him when he realised i dance round poles!

reet just got back from the dentist today.. and i just got a coffee and thought i'd check up on me e mails.. any ways i gets to the putor and i have a message from some unknown bint......this is what happened..it becomes clear very quickly that i'm dealing with an automatom or however its spelt.....
Recent Messages (F3)

lilyummylisa22: ok im back. sorry bout hat. still there?
hugh jarse: just!! what can i do you for?
lilyummylisa22: oh your there hi...
hugh jarse: hi
lilyummylisa22: a/s/l (agge sex location)?
hugh jarse: yes please
lilyummylisa22: im 27/f/USA. was lookin at your pprofile. thought you might like to chat.
hugh jarse: and where abouts in yankland is you
lilyummylisa22: so what havee you been up to flem_greenthroat?
hugh jarse: oh ave just been to the dentist
lilyummylisa22: cool. i was jjust hangin out watching tv. i was getting kinda horny (*blushes)
hugh jarse: tut tut
lilyummylisa22: feel like a little cyber fun with me ? please pleasse...
hugh jarse: what,, you want me to **** infront of me computor??!! shock horrer and stuff
lilyummylisa22: alright how bout i get down on my knees in front of you and help you out of your pants?
hugh jarse: not wearing any..i just spilt me beer down them so i took them orf
lilyummylisa22: jut lounging around in my undies.... u?
hugh jarse: is that the same ones you had on last night
lilyummylisa22: tell me whqt you want me to do with you while i slip out of my panties
hugh jarse: well you could start with that big pile of washing up thats been in the sink for gawd nose how long
lilyummylisa22: oh yeah babe.. dont stop. while i slide my hand down betweeen my legs and part my moist l@@s
hugh jarse: look you can do all that after you finish the ironing
hugh jarse: oh and bring me another beer
lilyummylisa22: oh it feels so good. Im holding your pulsing c@@k in my hand, my shiny red fingernails dig gently into your b@lls, while my full, soft lips engulf the mass of your me@t
lilyummylisa22: open my website so you can look at me while om s@cking you. use the link in my profile!
hugh jarse: ffs woman get yer heid oot the road am trying to watch red drawf
lilyummylisa22: what do ou think of my pics?
hugh jarse: thats a nice one of you at the caravan site
lilyummylisa22: **** the phone. dont stopp stroking it. hold on...
hugh jarse: **** orf .yer not ****ting on my phone
lilyummylisa22: sorry, I have to take this call, probly take bout five minutes. If you want, come to my page qnd lets finish this. I have my cam on there cyberfungirls dot com look for me on there
hugh jarse: nnah no thanks ave gotta have red hot knives stuck up me toe nails

hey slob, have you recovered! not even i am that bad!

i thought it was you in yer day job nay

oh s**t got found out! fancy i swim in me cider pool

little nay said:

hey slob, have you recovered! not even i am that bad!

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i wiz just getting started when the tart ferked orf.. well the autoprog ran its course.. you'd think yahoo could stop trouts from doing that kinda crud.. ah mean my teenage son could have been hit with that

slob said:

i wiz just getting started when the tart ferked orf.. well the autoprog ran its course.. you'd think yahoo could stop trouts from doing that kinda crud.. ah mean my teenage son could have been hit with that

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you are quite right and don't listen to the yella fella, it wasn't me!
i have a teenage son who could have copped it to so i know where you are coming from. complain to yahoo!

aye, he would have been walking around with a hard on fer a week

ha ha ha ha ha h ah ha h a thats the funniest thing i've heard in ages.... complain to yahoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo oh ffs sake ma sides hurt

yella disco said:

aye, he would have been walking around with a hard on fer a week

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who, slob or his nipper?

only problem is he can't work computors cos his mom and pigboy don't let him near theirs

little nay said:

who, slob or his nipper?

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not me i only have a boner fer lil nay

both, and i wouldnt say slobs lad is a nipper, hes nearly 7 foot tall

slob said:

not me i only have a boner fer lil nay

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ooooh can i have a butchers! lets swim in my cider pool!

ok so long as i get to play at submarines.. down periscope, down periscope, DOWN PERISCOPE AH SAID DOWN PERISCOPE......... prepare tube number 1 mr ****......

open my website so you can look at me while om s@cking you. use the link in my profile!

What link???? where ???? cant see it
urry up i wer just gerrin into that

you can play submarines and i can sink you!

what wiff???? you got big bazookas or summin

mondo said:

open my website so you can look at me while om s@cking you. use the link in my profile!

What link???? where ???? cant see it
urry up i wer just gerrin into that

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you bin drinkin harpic again...... yer clean round the bend

oh yes! and mondo has just sacked us/you/me! oh well