Best one I've been involved in was a group of us on a mates farm .. owner, not just tenant farmer ..
Messing about in a hole and a couple of JCB'd hills and some pillock comes across on a quad-bike, we'd seen the tracks crossing a field, with a couple of his mates on 'crossers.
He pulls up in high dudgeon, "WTF you f'ers doing here, get orf moi laaaand" etc .. We just peed ourselves laughing and he went ballistic, but instead of actually fighting or kicking our Landies, he was stood on the guad, and stamped on the front mudguard of it, which promptly and quite unexpectedly snapped it, tipping him to the ground and making him then fall forward over the handlebars and drag his leg back up through and over the broken guard ... 'course we were sympathetic .. NOT!!
Then mate comes across in his Manitou, and the quad rider goes quiet .. despite the gash in his thigh ..
We made them get off the bikes and quad and push them the correct way off the land, via 'proper' tracks ... about three miles as the tracks are direct for the farm, but not for the housing estate
They weren't best pleased.
Messing about in a hole and a couple of JCB'd hills and some pillock comes across on a quad-bike, we'd seen the tracks crossing a field, with a couple of his mates on 'crossers.
He pulls up in high dudgeon, "WTF you f'ers doing here, get orf moi laaaand" etc .. We just peed ourselves laughing and he went ballistic, but instead of actually fighting or kicking our Landies, he was stood on the guad, and stamped on the front mudguard of it, which promptly and quite unexpectedly snapped it, tipping him to the ground and making him then fall forward over the handlebars and drag his leg back up through and over the broken guard ... 'course we were sympathetic .. NOT!!
Then mate comes across in his Manitou, and the quad rider goes quiet .. despite the gash in his thigh ..
We made them get off the bikes and quad and push them the correct way off the land, via 'proper' tracks ... about three miles as the tracks are direct for the farm, but not for the housing estate
They weren't best pleased.
Best one I've been involved in was a group of us on a mates farm .. owner, not just tenant farmer ..
Messing about in a hole and a couple of JCB'd hills and some pillock comes across on a quad-bike, we'd seen the tracks crossing a field, with a couple of his mates on 'crossers.
He pulls up in high dudgeon, "WTF you f'ers doing here, get orf moi laaaand" etc .. We just peed ourselves laughing and he went ballistic, but instead of actually fighting or kicking our Landies, he was stood on the guad, and stamped on the front mudguard of it, which promptly and quite unexpectedly snapped it, tipping him to the ground and making him then fall forward over the handlebars and drag his leg back up through and over the broken guard ... 'course we were sympathetic .. NOT!!
Then mate comes across in his Manitou, and the quad rider goes quiet .. despite the gash in his thigh ..
We made them get off the bikes and quad and push them the correct way off the land, via 'proper' tracks ... about three miles as the tracks are direct for the farm, but not for the housing estate
They weren't best pleased.
Nice one. There are some proper clowns out there.
I'll be on that lane on Saturday and we will be whiter than white, but we'll be stopping on the lane for lunch and if he comes along with his pompous little note pad he'll be reported to the fuzz for harrassment.
One way of making friends with farmer is to offer him and his dog a slice of cake and a cuppa.The one we chatted with was happy as larry stuffing his face
Well he never expected that on his dog walk.
Clarky130
New Member
One way of making friends with farmer is to offer him and his dog a slice of cake and a cuppa.The one we chatted with was happy as larry stuffing his face
Yes, but your cake can defuse wars, 110... and that's coming from someone who doesn't like cake!
You should do a run to Afghanistan... get 'em all to stop scrapping.
Then again... they'd probably form factions around which cake was the best, and start scrapping all over again...
chunkymunky
New Member
Where I do work in uncles wood, access is via short green lane that gets too narrow just after entrance to woods.
Had numerous snooties, ask me what I think I am doing, what gives me the right and i.d too. Bunch of weekend residents.
I show them my leptosporosis card. Inform them (as they read the risks of coming into contact with someone exposed to it) that I am nephew of owner and performing conservation copicing for him. I then insist on shaking their hand. They shrink away very quickly.
Had numerous snooties, ask me what I think I am doing, what gives me the right and i.d too. Bunch of weekend residents.
I show them my leptosporosis card. Inform them (as they read the risks of coming into contact with someone exposed to it) that I am nephew of owner and performing conservation copicing for him. I then insist on shaking their hand. They shrink away very quickly.
Mr Noisy
Coming in your ears.
I have always found farmers to be a lot friendlier than bobblies. We usually stop to chat with farmers cos they always seem interested/otherwise bored and often share a decent amount of local knowledge!
Bobblies are just on a mission though and can't be reasoned with. Tis a shame cos the vast majority of lanes are now bridle way
Bobblies are just on a mission though and can't be reasoned with. Tis a shame cos the vast majority of lanes are now bridle way
psulli16
Well-Known Member
Lord of Manor update,,,,, well we were back on the lane Saturday. Sadly mr manor was not there. However he took our advice ( he must have listened to Mr Kippers dulcet tones ). He has now placed a pole blocking cars illegally entering his field. Hopefully no fecking idiots remove it. Mr Kipper did however meet Mr Manors two ugly sisters, one clearly owns pheasant steps the other is the sole protector of the whole entire natural spring water supply of Europe !!!
Seems word is getting about that I need abuse in my life.
Oh well least something positive has come out of it and mr tieknot has done something proactive about an issue.
So anyone got a portable bridge near Machynlleth?
BIGBENNY777
New Member
Seems word is getting about that I need abuse in my life.
dixie said he'll give ya some if ya want
as he always do 
