Gratch Of Bellend
New Member
Well seems like a fitting job for you....
Cleaning bogs and wiping up spunky caravan cushions
Cleaning bogs and wiping up spunky caravan cushions
Afternoon bobWell seems like a fitting job for you....
Cleaning bogs and wiping up spunky caravan cushions
AllanWorms
Well-Known Member
None of my mates mentioned doing a ram raid on Thursday... but I haven't talked to them lately, because we've all been getting ****ed for the holidays
One of the Anaesthetists at work reported his car stolen... after a couple of drinks with workmates... The cops called him several days later to tell him they'd found it... It was in the street he left it in... He thought he'd parked one street over
I feel sorry for the Tourists who have this crap happen. There are some real scumbags around. Because we live near a "tourist spot", we often warn people about parking smarter, or occasionally get them to park in our driveway. They don't understand how things work here. Same with the weather - It's nice in the morning, so they walk for 3 hours, then get stranded when it turns to **** later in the day. Or the sunburn - they don't understand that 10 minutes of full sun can ruin the next 3 days for you.
My Disco hasn't been stolen for a ram raid yet... I guess they figure it'll either break down or run out of petrol before they get to the shop
One of the Anaesthetists at work reported his car stolen... after a couple of drinks with workmates... The cops called him several days later to tell him they'd found it... It was in the street he left it in... He thought he'd parked one street over
I feel sorry for the Tourists who have this crap happen. There are some real scumbags around. Because we live near a "tourist spot", we often warn people about parking smarter, or occasionally get them to park in our driveway. They don't understand how things work here. Same with the weather - It's nice in the morning, so they walk for 3 hours, then get stranded when it turns to **** later in the day. Or the sunburn - they don't understand that 10 minutes of full sun can ruin the next 3 days for you.
My Disco hasn't been stolen for a ram raid yet... I guess they figure it'll either break down or run out of petrol before they get to the shop
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
Good on you, you have to prepare with gusto for the holidaysNone of my mates mentioned doing a ram raid on Thursday... but I haven't talked to them lately, because we've all been getting ****ed for the holidays
One of the Anaesthetists at work reported his car stolen... after a couple of drinks with workmates... The cops called him several days later to tell him they'd found it... It was in the street he left it in... He thought he'd parked one street over
I feel sorry for the Tourists who have this crap happen. There are some real scumbags around. Because we live near a "tourist spot", we often warn people about parking smarter, or occasionally get them to park in our driveway. They don't understand how things work here. Same with the weather - It's nice in the morning, so they walk for 3 hours, then get stranded when it turns to **** later in the day. Or the sunburn - they don't understand that 10 minutes of full sun can ruin the next 3 days for you.
My Disco hasn't been stolen for a ram raid yet... I guess they figure it'll either break down or run out of petrol before they get to the shop
I raided the Timothy Taylors Landlord from New World today - you probably won't know what that is, but the Brits on here will do. I'll be seeing the new year in with it. Better than bubbly Hope I never need an operation when I'm up your way
Mind you, you guys in Whangarei did an awesome job sorting out an elderly lady who had one of our vans and broke her arm a couple of months back. I dropped a young couple and their toddler off at the airport yesterday, they had had a station wagon from us camping for 3 1/2 months (car was a right tip!) - well they had the car for that length of time, the last 2 1/2 weeks he spent in Timaru hospital with a knee infection! He'd had surgery on it a year ago in Germany evidently and they recon the infection had been dormant in the knee since then before flaring up.
I have heard that it is a different way of life up in the far north. When the guy sitting on a box at the entrance to the car park says its 5 bucks to look after your car, you pay him
We had a couple pull into the yard the other day to drop off their camper wearing these...
We had a joke with them about it, but quite a practical solution for the sun. As they said, the sort of hats your parents used to make you wear when you were kids that you hated....
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
I've been on a road trip the past 2 days. We had a campervan in the Christchurch depot that needed to get to the Auckland depot for a hire picking up on Friday. I had a ferry crossing, from South to North Islands, booked for 2:15pm on Wednesday from Picton, getting me in to Wellington at 5:45pm and a return flight booked for 4:10pm today (Thursday).
So I set out from the yard at 7:15am giving me 6 hours to get to Picton for check in. Its a route I've travelled many times before but first time in a van. Weather was a mix of drizzel and sunshine. The route starts out over the Canterbury Plains with a backdrop of the Southern Alps, then hits the Hundalee Hills that you climb over taking you down to the coast near Kaikoura. I needed a pee stop there, luckily I had a self contained camper!
About 1/2 way to Kaikoura I caught up with 'the' train - it really is 'the' train, its the only (passenger) train of the day on the route - the Trans Scenic. In fact the only other train on the South Island is the daily Trans Alpine that cuts across the Alps from East to West coasts. The train caught me up again when I stopped for the pee, one for the train buffs...
From Kaikoura the road hugs the coast, passing seal colonies, before hitting the Marlborough wine country and then through Blenheim and on to Picton in the Marlborough Sounds. Picton's a lovely town where we have holidayed on numerous occasions, but this was my first time doing the ferry crossing. Got there about 45 minutes before last check in...
The ferry heads off down the Queen Charlotte Sound, then across the Cook Straight to Wellington.
We've been to Wellington a number of times (including to watch West Ham on a pre season tour!) but no time for sight seeing this time as I had to make ground so I could catch a plane the next day. So I headed straight out of town and up SH1. We've also been to various other North Island cities, but I've never driven around the North Island, so it was all new to me. Leaving Wellington you hit a new 'Express Way' that made headings for its massive cost, Transmission Gully. What a scary road. NZ has many 'hold your breath because you're going to fall off a cliff' type roads, but this is a series of really long steep inclines, dropping gears to keep some sort of speed up, followed by equally long and steep decents where you're once again dropping gears to slow the frikin thing down and stop carnage. There will be some serious accidents on this road.
Once past this, there's no more serious hills to navigate, but the road switches back to old skool SH1 which is little more than a UK B road all the way up to Hamilton which is probably a 500km stretch. I wanted to get as far as possible before stopping for the night to give myself a decent chance of getting to Auckland in time to catch the plane home. I targetted Waiuru.
It soon got dark and the weather deteriorated. Driving conditions were poor and there were lots of road works. At 1 point the road was closed with a diversion that went right round the Ohakea Air Force Base! Past Bulls I came up behind a truck and trailer that had 1/2 the Blackpool illuminations on the back of it. I considered overtaking it, but the conditions were so bad that I was happy to just sit behind it and let its driver show me the way. I followed it all the way to Taihapi where he pulled over. It was 9pm by then, but I carried on and made my way to Waiuru by about 9:45 where I decided to find somewhere to park the van for the night. It was pitch black and piddling with rain, but I found what looked like a lorry park. At least it was a gravel area with a couple of lorries parked up. So I stuck myself in the corner by the road and stopped. Time for dinner...
And bed...
Once I settled down, I suddenly thought I may have parked in some company's parking lot or summat. But I needed sleep, so I weren't moving - just expecting a knock on the window in the morning! Woke up at 6, took a look out of the curtains, lorries gone and it turns out I'm parked up in Waiuru train station car park...
Waiuru is like Salisbury Plains in UK - big army training exercise area. There's a big army museum there, but once again, no time to stop, I hit the road by 7am. Weather cleared and daylight showed me the fantastic scenery to be had on the North Island. The areas I drove through were stunning. Mount Ruapehu...
Mount Tongariro...
Didn't have time to stop for other pics, or visit the "National Trout Museum" or "National Timber Museums" that I passed around the Taupo area! The area is wonderful, lot of great native bush and streams, the lake of course and the unbelievable steam vents all around Taupo. The towns looked really olde worlde to, interesting area.
But I had to crack on. Got to the depot in Auckland, through more serious rain and terrible driving conditions, by 1:30pm having covered almost exactly 1,000km since leaving at 7:15am the previous day. Time to say hello to everyone in the deport before a lift to the airport and a 1 hour dash home on the plane!
I shall definitely be taking some time out in the future to explore the areas I passed through.
So I set out from the yard at 7:15am giving me 6 hours to get to Picton for check in. Its a route I've travelled many times before but first time in a van. Weather was a mix of drizzel and sunshine. The route starts out over the Canterbury Plains with a backdrop of the Southern Alps, then hits the Hundalee Hills that you climb over taking you down to the coast near Kaikoura. I needed a pee stop there, luckily I had a self contained camper!
About 1/2 way to Kaikoura I caught up with 'the' train - it really is 'the' train, its the only (passenger) train of the day on the route - the Trans Scenic. In fact the only other train on the South Island is the daily Trans Alpine that cuts across the Alps from East to West coasts. The train caught me up again when I stopped for the pee, one for the train buffs...
From Kaikoura the road hugs the coast, passing seal colonies, before hitting the Marlborough wine country and then through Blenheim and on to Picton in the Marlborough Sounds. Picton's a lovely town where we have holidayed on numerous occasions, but this was my first time doing the ferry crossing. Got there about 45 minutes before last check in...
The ferry heads off down the Queen Charlotte Sound, then across the Cook Straight to Wellington.
We've been to Wellington a number of times (including to watch West Ham on a pre season tour!) but no time for sight seeing this time as I had to make ground so I could catch a plane the next day. So I headed straight out of town and up SH1. We've also been to various other North Island cities, but I've never driven around the North Island, so it was all new to me. Leaving Wellington you hit a new 'Express Way' that made headings for its massive cost, Transmission Gully. What a scary road. NZ has many 'hold your breath because you're going to fall off a cliff' type roads, but this is a series of really long steep inclines, dropping gears to keep some sort of speed up, followed by equally long and steep decents where you're once again dropping gears to slow the frikin thing down and stop carnage. There will be some serious accidents on this road.
Once past this, there's no more serious hills to navigate, but the road switches back to old skool SH1 which is little more than a UK B road all the way up to Hamilton which is probably a 500km stretch. I wanted to get as far as possible before stopping for the night to give myself a decent chance of getting to Auckland in time to catch the plane home. I targetted Waiuru.
It soon got dark and the weather deteriorated. Driving conditions were poor and there were lots of road works. At 1 point the road was closed with a diversion that went right round the Ohakea Air Force Base! Past Bulls I came up behind a truck and trailer that had 1/2 the Blackpool illuminations on the back of it. I considered overtaking it, but the conditions were so bad that I was happy to just sit behind it and let its driver show me the way. I followed it all the way to Taihapi where he pulled over. It was 9pm by then, but I carried on and made my way to Waiuru by about 9:45 where I decided to find somewhere to park the van for the night. It was pitch black and piddling with rain, but I found what looked like a lorry park. At least it was a gravel area with a couple of lorries parked up. So I stuck myself in the corner by the road and stopped. Time for dinner...
And bed...
Once I settled down, I suddenly thought I may have parked in some company's parking lot or summat. But I needed sleep, so I weren't moving - just expecting a knock on the window in the morning! Woke up at 6, took a look out of the curtains, lorries gone and it turns out I'm parked up in Waiuru train station car park...
Waiuru is like Salisbury Plains in UK - big army training exercise area. There's a big army museum there, but once again, no time to stop, I hit the road by 7am. Weather cleared and daylight showed me the fantastic scenery to be had on the North Island. The areas I drove through were stunning. Mount Ruapehu...
Mount Tongariro...
Didn't have time to stop for other pics, or visit the "National Trout Museum" or "National Timber Museums" that I passed around the Taupo area! The area is wonderful, lot of great native bush and streams, the lake of course and the unbelievable steam vents all around Taupo. The towns looked really olde worlde to, interesting area.
But I had to crack on. Got to the depot in Auckland, through more serious rain and terrible driving conditions, by 1:30pm having covered almost exactly 1,000km since leaving at 7:15am the previous day. Time to say hello to everyone in the deport before a lift to the airport and a 1 hour dash home on the plane!
I shall definitely be taking some time out in the future to explore the areas I passed through.
kernowsvenski
Well-Known Member
It's like a Rick Stein programme innit. What with that dinner and all...
*edit* I enjoyed the read Gerald btw
*edit* I enjoyed the read Gerald btw
NorfolkBird
Well-Known Member
Great read, but I dunno how you can sleep with yer feet out of the duvet
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
I poked them out for pictorial effect.Great read, but I dunno how you can sleep with yer feet out of the duvet
They were snuggly under the duvet for night nights.
AllanWorms
Well-Known Member
Up here in northern NZ, it's still that ime of year, where I have the blankets up to my neck... but from the knees down has to be poking out!
Still another month, before I can manage to put my weighted blanket back on though
I really enjoyed your story. It's quite a trip - Tourists don't understand what driving in NZ is like, until they've experienced it, either. Everything looks close on a map... but it's a long way in real life!
I brought a Suzuki Cappuccino in Christchurch many years ago. We ended up leaving CHCH at midnight (on an Anzac day weekend) and I stopped for a pee in a similar place to you... But it was SOOOOOO windy, I had to turn sideways while peeing, so I didn't get splashed in the face and it didn't wet the ground for about 20 metres
We left Christchurch Midnight Sunday, slept in the Cappo at Lyttleton, waiting for the ferry for an hour, crossed over and drove to Auckland by 10PM the next night... Then did the last stint to Whangarei on Anzac day, Monday.
There was quite a stretch at night up the Kaikoura coast area where the Cappo sat on it's top speed limiter (a "slight" 40km/h over the limit!) I slowed down for both the cars we saw outside the main towns.
I remember, that weekend was SOOOOO cold - in Christchurch, there was hail/sleet built up against the side of building on the footpaths, from 3 days before
Lucky we took a polar-fleece jacket each 
Still another month, before I can manage to put my weighted blanket back on though
I really enjoyed your story. It's quite a trip - Tourists don't understand what driving in NZ is like, until they've experienced it, either. Everything looks close on a map... but it's a long way in real life!
I brought a Suzuki Cappuccino in Christchurch many years ago. We ended up leaving CHCH at midnight (on an Anzac day weekend) and I stopped for a pee in a similar place to you... But it was SOOOOOO windy, I had to turn sideways while peeing, so I didn't get splashed in the face and it didn't wet the ground for about 20 metres
We left Christchurch Midnight Sunday, slept in the Cappo at Lyttleton, waiting for the ferry for an hour, crossed over and drove to Auckland by 10PM the next night... Then did the last stint to Whangarei on Anzac day, Monday.
There was quite a stretch at night up the Kaikoura coast area where the Cappo sat on it's top speed limiter (a "slight" 40km/h over the limit!) I slowed down for both the cars we saw outside the main towns
.I remember, that weekend was SOOOOO cold - in Christchurch, there was hail/sleet built up against the side of building on the footpaths, from 3 days before
Lucky we took a polar-fleece jacket each
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
We're really selling this place as a holiday destination, freezing hail up the sides of buildings in the South Island, torrential rain that you need Blackpool Illuminations to follow on the North Island, with shitty roads thrown in.Up here in northern NZ, it's still that ime of year, where I have the blankets up to my neck... but from the knees down has to be poking out!
Still another month, before I can manage to put my weighted blanket back on though
I really enjoyed your story. It's quite a trip - Tourists don't understand what driving in NZ is like, until they've experienced it, either. Everything looks close on a map... but it's a long way in real life!
I brought a Suzuki Cappuccino in Christchurch many years ago. We ended up leaving CHCH at midnight (on an Anzac day weekend) and I stopped for a pee in a similar place to you... But it was SOOOOOO windy, I had to turn sideways while peeing, so I didn't get splashed in the face and it didn't wet the ground for about 20 metres
We left Christchurch Midnight Sunday, slept in the Cappo at Lyttleton, waiting for the ferry for an hour, crossed over and drove to Auckland by 10PM the next night... Then did the last stint to Whangarei on Anzac day, Monday.
There was quite a stretch at night up the Kaikoura coast area where the Cappo sat on it's top speed limiter (a "slight" 40km/h over the limit!) I slowed down for both the cars we saw outside the main towns
I remember, that weekend was SOOOOO cold - in Christchurch, there was hail/sleet built up against the side of building on the footpaths, from 3 days before
Trying to get a couple of weeks at the end of April to tour the Winterless North. I can have a van from work for free, can book it 2 weeks before I go.... when they'll all be rented out!
Need a plan B
ER1C
Well-Known Member
webbed I erd anorl..
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
Just took a call on the breakdown technical support line.
Customer has pulled into a freedom camping site and got stuck in mud. 9pm at night, can't do anything tonight, kip there and I'll call in the morning. If necessary I'll organise a tow truck to pull them out.
Just went in to Street View from their tracker location and this is literally the first frame it gives me...
From this pic, I wonder where the camper is
Customer has pulled into a freedom camping site and got stuck in mud. 9pm at night, can't do anything tonight, kip there and I'll call in the morning. If necessary I'll organise a tow truck to pull them out.
Just went in to Street View from their tracker location and this is literally the first frame it gives me...
From this pic, I wonder where the camper is
NorfolkBird
Well-Known Member
Better take yer waders......Just took a call on thebreakdowntechnical support line.
Customer has pulled into a freedom camping site and got stuck in mud. 9pm at night, can't do anything tonight, kip there and I'll call in the morning. If necessary I'll organise a tow truck to pull them out.
Just went in to Street View from their tracker location and this is literally the first frame it gives me...
View attachment 320638
From this pic, I wonder where the camper is
GrumpyGel
Well-Known Member
It was lucky it didn't fall off a cliff into the drink.WTF?
(I looked at the first picture and thought it’s fallen down a hole
AllanWorms
Well-Known Member
And I bet that's all a lot steeper than it looks in pics.
If I want to hire a camper, how drunk will I need to be, so I can pass the dumbass test to get one?
