hi, looking to swap a freelander haynes manual 1997-2002 (r reg onwards) petrol and diesel, for a vauxhall haynes manual, astra 2.0 dti 2004,
condition is brand new,

why do the words "tight" and "git" spring to mind

"tight" and "git"? just looked at your last few posts, "pot" and "kettle" spring to mind there,
I am just trying to help anyone who needs a manual, thats what this place is about

Have you seen the price of Haynes manuals these days? I'd say swapsies are a great way of doing it.

Bazzer said:

"tight" and "git"? just looked at your last few posts, "pot" and "kettle" spring to mind there,
I am just trying to help anyone who needs a manual, thats what this place is about

Click to expand...

oh go on then ....explain ya comment

or are you confusing my search for a proven veg oil system as a wallet constriction ?

everyone is looking for a bargain or a cheaper way of solving a problem,and who can blame them, you and I are no exception.
reading through your posts shows that you also dont want to throw money about

thanks ambriel, hope other people think the same

Bazzer said:

everyone is looking for a bargain or a cheaper way of solving a problem,and who can blame them, you and I are no exception.
reading through your posts shows that you also dont want to throw money about

Click to expand...

i've got more than 1 land rover ergo i must have money to "throw about"

i am impression with your optimism

more than one land rover, well you must have pots of brass, I only had one and it was ready to bankrupt me

advantage of a second hand haynes manual is that instead of relying on the stupid 1 to 5 spanner rating for difficulty, you just look at the amount of fingerprints on the page. lots of fingerprints, jobs a c**t.

good pointer there wigleytuff, mine is as clean as a whistle,bought it when I first got the freelander,only had the car for ten months as I was hoping to keep it, had all the work done on warranty, then got shut of it because of all the faults, in between the problems it was a really nice car

perhaps I could sell some stick on fingerprints to give the haynes manual that authentic look. plus when you sell it, you could give the manual with the car, and say "look, I did all these jobs"

then probably every page would have dirty fingerprints on it

wigleytuff said:

advantage of a second hand haynes manual is that instead of relying on the stupid 1 to 5 spanner rating for difficulty, you just look at the amount of fingerprints on the page. lots of fingerprints, jobs a c**t.

Click to expand...

hahahahahahah so true-

These Haynes Manual Definitions has probably been posted before...

Haynes Real Definitions
Manual: Rotate anticlockwise.
Translation: Clamp with molegrips (adjustable wrench) then beat repeatedly
with hammer anticlockwise. You do know which way is anticlockwise, don't
you?

Manual: Should remove easily.
Translation: Will be corroded into place ... clamp with adjustable wrench
then beat repeatedly with a hammer.

Manual: Remove small retaining clip.
Translation: Take off 15 years of stubborn crud, it's there somewhere.

Manual: This is a snug fit.
Translation: You will skin your knuckles! ... Clamp with adjustable wrench
then beat repeatedly with hammer.

Manual: This is a tight fit.
Translation: Not a hope in hell matey! ... Clamp with adjustable wrench then
beat repeatedly with hammer.

Manual: One spanner rating (simple).
Translation: Your Mum could do this... so how did you manage to botch it up?

Manual: Two spanner rating.
Translation: Now you may think that you can do this because two is a low,
tiny, ikkle number... but you also thought that the wiring diagram was a map
of the Tokyo underground (in fact that would have been more use to you).

Manual: Three spanner rating (intermediate).
Translation: Make sure you won't need your car for a couple of days and that your AA cover includes Home Start.
Translation: But Novas are easy to maintain right... right? So you think
three Nova spanners has got to be like a 'regular car' two spanner job.

Manual: Four spanner rating.
Translation: You are seriously considering this aren't you, you pleb!

Manual: Five spanner rating (expert).
Translation: OK - but don't expect us to ride it afterwards!!!
Translation #2: Don't ever carry your loved ones in it again and don't
mention it to your insurance company.

Manual: If not, you can fabricate your own special tool like this...
Translation: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

Manual: Carefully...
Translation: You are about to cut yourself!

Manual: Retaining nut...
Translation: Yes, that's it, that big spherical blob of rust.